England has woken up to a blanket of snow, and we all expect that true to form the nation will come to a stand-still. If the Canadians, Swiss, Scandinavians and let’s face it, even the Scottish pay any attention to us at all they will be laughing at our uncanny ability to let a bit of the white stuff disrupt the most simple of tasks.

Is our infrastructure quite that feeble? We think there might be something else at play, and play is the operative word. Your CEO has woken up this morning, looked out of the window and shrieked with childish joy. All he wants to do is wrap up in his hat, scarf and gloves and be the first to leave his footprints in the unspoiled snow, so he’s called everything off. The day is cancelled. Work can wait when there’s fun to be had.

Contrary to popular belief, it also snows in paradise, and we’re making the most of it. What better way to spend a snow day than rolling around making snow angels with a real angel. There’s something irresistible about a girl from paradise wrapping up in all of her winter clothes when you know that you’ll be stripping her down by the fire, with her cheeks glowing from the cold and hair dripping from your flirtatious snowball fight.

If this keeps up we might be looking at being “snowed in.” That’s when there’s enough snow that you would have to scrape some off your windshield to drive your car. Seeing as no-one is going anywhere, we suggest that you crack open a bottle of something and imagine you’re in an alpine chalet with a beautiful girl to keep you warm with her divine company until the snow melts away and normal life resumes.

While there are girls from paradise to keep you company, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!